I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Randomize
