yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
