My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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