im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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