I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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