It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize
