he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
