I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Randomize
