ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Come see our sink grown plant.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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