reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
