And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
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