I wannas sexs uuuuu
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
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