I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
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