remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
