I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
