I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
What drink are we having for lunch?
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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