Heybabeimwearingurpanties
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
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