I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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