Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
