Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
