You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
