It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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