My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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