Dual....:-)
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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