Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Dignity is for republicans.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
