you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
