FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
