Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Randomize
