yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
