just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
