So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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