at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
