Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
