Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Randomize
