Umm I'm too high to move.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
