Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
