it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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