girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Randomize
