you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Randomize
