as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
