I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Randomize
