What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Randomize