saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
