how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
