You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Panties = found
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
