I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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