Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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