OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Randomize
