I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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