There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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